My cat found an old raggedy toy that my recently deceased dog favored for more than a decade. I looked for this specific toy before we buried our doggie last month.
And never found it. My cat, this particular one of my cats.plural, was a bit parented by my dog two years ago, and they seemed to have a special affection for one another.
I never know what my surviving pets think when one of them "goes missing." I sometimes have a tiny wake, i.e. display of the remains, when the end has come, that they may see their companion in his or her final state. I neglected to do so this past November, when our 15-year-old dog died at the end of a long, violent seizure, followed by some hours of veterinary attention that did not revive him.
I miss him.
Anyway, my cat found the bedraggled, yet still gaily-colored "Lobister" toy and was carrying it about. I am sure that my old puppy's saliva scent is still all over that toy. I will wait a long time before I wash it.
I said to the cat "You must be able to smell our puppy all over that lobister. We all miss him."
I know nearly all of him is still under the ground out back. But perhaps some of the atoms from our old cats now long buried have made the way through the soil into traveling bugs and worms, or up through the tall tall pine via the roots. Perhaps some atoms of Greykin, Thanksgiving, and Chamois are emitted as scent from a pine needle, or glistening in the sap on this sunny, cold day.
Every so often, perhaps I breathe an atom of one of them in and then out. Is that how it happens sometimes that I feel as if they are so near?
